There was some thread a while ago, probably a for sale one, where the owner described his bike quite well, and it got me thinking how I would describe my 950 (and XChallenge actually soon) if I were to sell it one day for some crazy reason, or what a good marketing pitch would have been for it.
ChatGPT returned an acceptible version, and then I really got to work on it
This is my final, biased sales pitch
Unleash Your Spirit of Adventure with the 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S!
There’s a reason why the 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S is hailed as one of the most legendary rally and adventure bikes ever built. It’s not just another motorcycle - it’s a masterpiece of equal parts engineering and soul, crafted for the fearless explorer who thrives on the thrill of the ride.
If you’re the type of rider who dreams of pushing boundaries while exploring uncharted paths over long distances, this bike was made for you.
At the heart of this beast is the powerful LC8 942cc 75-degree V-twin engine, designed to deliver a thrilling 71kW at 8,000 RPM and 95Nm of torque at 6,000 RPM. The mindblowing acceleration this adventure bike is capable of will catch the unaware offguard as the front wheel eagerly lifts in 1st, 2nd and 3rd gear, with 100km/h coming up in just over 4 seconds.
The engine provides the perfect blend of power and responsiveness, allowing you to conquer any terrain with confidence.
This S model features optional twin Acropovic exhausts, which transforms the muted purr of the standard bike into a throbbing rumble at idle, and into a deep guttural roar when the throttle is twisted with intent.
But the KTM 950 Adventure S isn’t just about raw power — it’s a bike built for true adventure, rewarding capable riders endowed with the right balance of precision, finesse and gung ho aggression with a ride that will leave them foaming at the mouth with unadulterated pleasure.
The six-speed transmission offers smooth, precise shifts, giving you complete control whether you’re tackling steep inclines, powering through desert sand dunes, or cruising on the open highway.
The S features tall, fully adjustable WP suspension, with 265mm of travel in the front and 260mm in the rear, designed and built to handle the roughest, most unpredictable terrain with the grace of a gazelle and the strength of a lion.
The 21-inch front and 18-inch rear wheels are designed for durability and stability, making it easy to power through, or simply over, rocks and anything else the trail might throw at you.
The bike’s braking system features robust Brembo brakes, with 300mm dual discs up front and a 240mm single disc at the rear, delivering exceptional stopping power when the need arises, although this beast prefers being steered through unexpected turns at speed with the rear wheel powering through sideways.
The 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S stands out with its rugged, tubular chrome-moly steel frame, which is both lightweight and incredibly strong, giving the bike a dry weight of only 198 kg that relegates most bikes from the competition into the sumo wrestler category. This makes it nimble enough to handle tight, technical trails while still being robust enough to carry you through the toughest environments.
The 22-liter (5.8-gallon) fuel tank offers a good range already, while the extra 2 x 4L carbon auxiliary fairing tanks on this specific bike allows you to venture even deeper into the wilderness without the constant need to refuel.
The bike’s ergonomics are optimized for both hard riding and long-distance comfort, featuring a comfortable enough seat, wide footpegs and handlebar placement that puts the rider in an aggressive position whether seated or standing, although riders over 6'2 might benefit from pivotable handlebar risers. The standard windscreen offers just the right amount of protection, with the optional touring screen reducing fatigue on long rides even further, while still maintaining a clear view of the road ahead.
Every twist of the throttle on this bike is a reminder that you’re riding a piece of history — a bike that was designed for, and ridden to victory in the world’s most grueling rallies by revered legends like Fabrizio Meoni and Giovanni Sala - a bike built around the true Spirit of Dakar.
It’s a bike that doesn’t just meet expectations - it smashes them, delivering an experience overflowing with pure, unfiltered adrenaline. Like sex on wheels, with the woman of your wildest fantasies, for hours on end...
This is not just another bike - this is thé bike.
The 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S is for the rider who demands one of the best adventure bikes ever, who seeks out the road less traveled, who is addicted to the rush of feeling truly alive, and who isn’t afraid to push the limits along the way.
Own the road.
Own the adventure.
Own a KTM 950 Adventure S
ChatGPT returned an acceptible version, and then I really got to work on it
This is my final, biased sales pitch
Unleash Your Spirit of Adventure with the 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S!
There’s a reason why the 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S is hailed as one of the most legendary rally and adventure bikes ever built. It’s not just another motorcycle - it’s a masterpiece of equal parts engineering and soul, crafted for the fearless explorer who thrives on the thrill of the ride.
If you’re the type of rider who dreams of pushing boundaries while exploring uncharted paths over long distances, this bike was made for you.
At the heart of this beast is the powerful LC8 942cc 75-degree V-twin engine, designed to deliver a thrilling 71kW at 8,000 RPM and 95Nm of torque at 6,000 RPM. The mindblowing acceleration this adventure bike is capable of will catch the unaware offguard as the front wheel eagerly lifts in 1st, 2nd and 3rd gear, with 100km/h coming up in just over 4 seconds.
The engine provides the perfect blend of power and responsiveness, allowing you to conquer any terrain with confidence.
This S model features optional twin Acropovic exhausts, which transforms the muted purr of the standard bike into a throbbing rumble at idle, and into a deep guttural roar when the throttle is twisted with intent.
But the KTM 950 Adventure S isn’t just about raw power — it’s a bike built for true adventure, rewarding capable riders endowed with the right balance of precision, finesse and gung ho aggression with a ride that will leave them foaming at the mouth with unadulterated pleasure.
The six-speed transmission offers smooth, precise shifts, giving you complete control whether you’re tackling steep inclines, powering through desert sand dunes, or cruising on the open highway.
The S features tall, fully adjustable WP suspension, with 265mm of travel in the front and 260mm in the rear, designed and built to handle the roughest, most unpredictable terrain with the grace of a gazelle and the strength of a lion.
The 21-inch front and 18-inch rear wheels are designed for durability and stability, making it easy to power through, or simply over, rocks and anything else the trail might throw at you.
The bike’s braking system features robust Brembo brakes, with 300mm dual discs up front and a 240mm single disc at the rear, delivering exceptional stopping power when the need arises, although this beast prefers being steered through unexpected turns at speed with the rear wheel powering through sideways.
The 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S stands out with its rugged, tubular chrome-moly steel frame, which is both lightweight and incredibly strong, giving the bike a dry weight of only 198 kg that relegates most bikes from the competition into the sumo wrestler category. This makes it nimble enough to handle tight, technical trails while still being robust enough to carry you through the toughest environments.
The 22-liter (5.8-gallon) fuel tank offers a good range already, while the extra 2 x 4L carbon auxiliary fairing tanks on this specific bike allows you to venture even deeper into the wilderness without the constant need to refuel.
The bike’s ergonomics are optimized for both hard riding and long-distance comfort, featuring a comfortable enough seat, wide footpegs and handlebar placement that puts the rider in an aggressive position whether seated or standing, although riders over 6'2 might benefit from pivotable handlebar risers. The standard windscreen offers just the right amount of protection, with the optional touring screen reducing fatigue on long rides even further, while still maintaining a clear view of the road ahead.
Every twist of the throttle on this bike is a reminder that you’re riding a piece of history — a bike that was designed for, and ridden to victory in the world’s most grueling rallies by revered legends like Fabrizio Meoni and Giovanni Sala - a bike built around the true Spirit of Dakar.
It’s a bike that doesn’t just meet expectations - it smashes them, delivering an experience overflowing with pure, unfiltered adrenaline. Like sex on wheels, with the woman of your wildest fantasies, for hours on end...
This is not just another bike - this is thé bike.
The 2004 KTM 950 Adventure S is for the rider who demands one of the best adventure bikes ever, who seeks out the road less traveled, who is addicted to the rush of feeling truly alive, and who isn’t afraid to push the limits along the way.
Own the road.
Own the adventure.
Own a KTM 950 Adventure S
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