OliveOil and tankgirl Lilo Lake Malawi *video added to first post*

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tankgirl

Pack Dog
Joined
Aug 7, 2008
Messages
309
Reaction score
6
Location
Pretoria
Bike
BMW G650 X-challenge
[flash=800,450]https://www.youtube.com/v/2eZ7yzZXoso[/flash]

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Life is always going to get in the way of the things we really wanna do.
We pile on more and more responsibilities every day as if it somehow amplifies our significance in this world.

“Fuck that!” says tankgirl.
“We going riding?”

*speculative silence*

“For shit sure!” says OliveOil.

Responsibilities redistributed, we set out on the heels of the unknown.
We’re going to Lake Malawi, exploring parts of Namibia on the way.

Day One rockets off with some showers for luck, the last rain for our thirty-day trip. Just as well because OliveOil’s poncho is shredded in the wind...

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Next morning is warm and bright and we praise the dry skies.
Butterflies when we fire up the bikes! Namibia awaits.

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After a fuel bladder and cheesecake malfunction at the Rose Café which is regrettably closed on Sundays, we reach Onseepkans/Velloorsdrift.
The contrast is ridiculous. Before crossing the Orange River you get the bumpiest piece of corrugated shit in the history of the sports bra.
But then, after a quick stamp in the passport, you have the Comfortably Numb solo all the way to Karasburg!
We ride side by side for a 100km. Not another soul in sight.

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Grünau serves oryx for dinner. OliveOil does not indulge but we celebrate our first Namibian brews and befriend some of the residents.

With our new MTC sim-cards we are able to navigate easily using google maps. Again, the roads are incredible and we encounter plenty of game.
We pack away one massive brunch at the Cañon Roadhouse before hitting the actual canyon. It’s big. Very big! Next time we’ll be hiking the trail.
Just as we’re about to leave the canyon a pair of GS1200’s pull up. A resident Windhoeker showing his Turkish friend around.
The friend is kinda funny-looking dressed in all black with the wallet chain and fingerless gloves. We have a chuckle, finish our beer and head off towards Ais-Ais.

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At the abandoned old car a sweet but very chatty Irish couple hi-jacks our photo session, making us pose for pictures with our bikes instead!

Motorcycles are people magnets. It’s undeniable.
Never will random folks come up to you asking where you from or where you going if you’re in a VW Polo.

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Our plan is to wild camp on the Orange River. The sun has already plummeted into the horizon.
It’s much too dark for dark visors by the time we've fumbled into a spot.
We’re tired, and not really in a mood for cooking, so we devour the choc-chip muffins we have left over from brunch.
We feel really privileged. For a long while we just lay on the soft sand bank next to our bikes and our five billion-star nylon-hotel. The world is our oyster.
Only a tiny can of Smith & Wesson pepper spray between us and every man-shaped tree out there.
Whenever a car crosses the bridge we dive into darkness and hold our breaths so our position isn't compromised!

Despite all the covert excitement we sleep really well and when we first lay eyes on our beautiful location the next morning it overwhelms us all over again!
We don’t really want to leave. We make coffee and happen upon some paw prints, alarmingly close to our tent!

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So far Namibia has exceeded all our expectations. And it's only our third day here!
Everywhere we ride, everything we see, everyone we meet makes us feel like royalty.

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The Gamchab canyon is everything I dreamed it would be. What a deadly piece of scenic curvature!
So deadly in fact, that my clutch completely fucks out. A brand new one, expensively fitted by BMW. Useless.
We're kind of in the middle of nowhere. Can't stay here.
After a few attempts I manage to pull off without stalling the bike and ride clutchless all the way to Rosh Pinah. We don't stop very often for photos.

At the filling station in Aus we meet a pair of German guys and we have ice-cream. Because we're on holiday!
The aim is to find some mechanical assistance in Lüderitz. Surely my rear tire won’t last another 7000km if it has to spin every time we take off!
First though, we must tame some savage horses and conquer post-apocalyptic landscapes, vicious sand blasts and brutal cross winds.
We love it! Our adventure.

A lot of folks are surprised at us embarking on this kind of trip, two helpless chicks.
Come on people. It’s 2015.

Lüderitz is such a charming little town, windswept and laid-back. Also, we upgrade from backpackers to penthouse!
That means we have to carry all our luggage five flights up an enchanted staircase.
Haus Hartmann 1909. A handsome hundred year-old building overlooking the harbour. So worth it!

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The oldest and sweetest car mechanic in town unfortunately cannot fix my bike but we manage to gather a bunch of contact names and numbers.
It's tomorrow's problem now.
Running downtown like a pair of idiots we try and catch the west coast sunset but fail by a mere five minutes. We both agree that it was a rather weak one anyway.
We return to our bodacious abode for a much needed and well-deserved shower.

The evening streets are quiet and so is the wind when we take a stroll in search of supper.
Kratzplatz is packed. We shake off our coats and share a table with that funny-looking Turkish dude, the same one from Fish River Canyon.
He and his friend parted ways over a difference in opinion regarding on- and off-road touring.
Good times, eating and drinking, until we find ourselves in the throes of a bona fide bar fight! Wow, we are really living it up!
Manfred, an old biker himself, compels me to practically sue BMW for the shitty clutch-job and sends us off with a round of shooters on the house.

We get going awfully early to catch Kolmanskop at sunrise. 6AM costs $225pp and 8AM is $80pp to enter.
With too little cash on hand, and too little time to wait, we disappointedly make our way back to Aus.
The hour or two we saved, not photographing the iconic houses filled with sand, is spent looking out over the Garub watering hole.
An assortment of horses, Oryx and even an ostrich makes an appearance!

The Bahnhoff Hotel serves us muesli with fresh fruit while we call and email around to get parts for my bike.
I'm not very good at orchestrating this kind of thing, especially from afar, but I am promised parts and quotes and it feels like everything is going to be okay.
Meanwhile, the camera's still rolling and we have Sesriem in sight. The D707 remains on the bucket list for now as Helmeringhausen's apple pie fills a gap.

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The lush landscapes surrounding Duwisib castle astound us and the stunning dirt roads deserve a mention again. They reward us just for being there.
We cruise along some fairly sandy roads up to Betta, carefully navigate around countless spooked Oryx trapped on the wrong side of the fence, breeze through NamibRand's mountain zebras, subconsciously chasing the sun again. We're making a habit of reaching our destinations after dark.
We spend the evening undoing an unfortunate shampoo/OMO spill and meet a mad cyclist from Belgium desperate for a physical therapist, or the next best thing. He'd pedalled 90km from Solitaire.

I make a mental note to one day try cycling a substantial distance. The concept thoroughly intrigues me.

At 5AM we hop on the staff shuttle that delivers us to Dead Vlei, freezing our tits off without complaint.
This is one of the photographic highlights of the entire trip, worth every shivering goose bump.
The messy sand tracks en route make us secretly very thankful that bikes are not allowed.
It's a beautifully clear day and we're surrounded by nothing but red Namib Desert dunes. The panoramic views are breath taking.
After soaking up the sunrise atop this magnificent force of nature, we inspect the salty white clay pan below and shoot some of the dead Acacias, as one does in Sossusvlei.

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Hearts filled with joy and shoes filled with sand, we summon two volunteers for our next trick.
*cue those two German dudes we met in Aus*
We need a lift back to camp and they graciously oblige. Turns out they won this all-expense-paid self-drive trip through Namibia in a lucky draw!
They hang out with us until time forces us to reluctantly pack up.
It entertains OliveOil no end that one of our tent pens had impaled the sewerage line and upon removal squirts an unhealthy jet stream of stink all over me.
I don't quite share her sense of humour about it until much later when I know I'm free and clear of e coli and cholera.

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We gulp down a late lunch in Solitaire and nail the long stretch to Walvisbay.
The Kuiseb pass catches us totally unawares. What a delight! Especially after the good rains, you'd be forgiven for believing in wormholes to the Scottish highlands!
Approaching the coastal town we are met with a massive fog bank coming in from the South Atlantic. Just as well there's no time to climb Dune Seven as the weather is really miserable.

OliveOil gets flagged down by the fuzz on my behalf for not stopping at a roadblock. I swear that cop waved us through.
We regroup after a tough talking-to by Swakop Traffic Police employee of the month. My clutchless downshifts into neutral need work.

We lie shamelessly to the uptight folks at Alte Brücke about using a mesh groundsheet. Me putting this here isn’t going to lead to some kind of investigation, is it?
A lovely young JHB couple drops in and an animated biking/over-landing discussion ensues.
An hour or so after clutch-fixing advice and a few riding tales are exchanged we pitch our tent and each enjoy a quick shower before realising we're famished! It's 9:15PM.
The Tiger Reef beach bar's kitchen is already closed by the time we rock up so we hope for the best and power-walk to the Jetty restaurant a little further uptown.
We are horribly underdressed with only 15 minutes to get our orders in. It's our friend Pop's birthday today and the celebratory Gin & Tonic goes down very smoothly.
Namibian daylight savings time means the cheers to you WhatsApp selfie falls on sleeping ears but the thought still counts.

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It's overcast and cold the next morning still. We hide all of our groundsheet-less evidence and after a quick laundry session hit the streets on foot again, armed with our cameras.
We get some cool shots of the jetty and walk around town a bit where a strong coffee aroma kidnaps us for breakfast at Café Treffpunkt.
OliveOil suggests I try the rohack, a firm favourite of hers growing up in Windhoek, when she was still proudly carnivorous.

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We break camp and make our way over to Marc's Auto, as recommended by BMW Windhoek.
After some poking around we find out the reason those splines on the operating shaft are stripped is because the worm mechanism was not fitted into its bearing properly.
Boom! Knocked in tight and the shaft is repositioned so that the undamaged teeth face the worm. And I have a usable clutch again! Just like that.
Simultaneously, the mystery of OliveOil's sporadic camera charger is solved by one of the other mechanics and we're good to go!

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Suffice it to say we must miss out on the fish & chips in Hentiesbay, and head for the Grösse Spitzkoppe.
We have the whole place to ourselves, the absolute best spot. A photographic dream destination. And it's dead quiet for miles around us.
We whip out the camp stove and do the noodle thing with baked beans. As a first time operator I am impressed with the usability of my Victorinox opener!
We find no glowing scorpions with the UV torch but then we don't exactly overturn any rocks. The stars blow our minds. A Friday night well spent.

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In an unexpected reversal of roles, I am the one who's told to get up. We have to get up now!
We peel off our sleeping bags and scramble up to the rock arch for a majestic sunrise. It's ours and ours alone.

The little restaurant at reception tempts us with pancakes and dangerously comfortable hammocks, seductively placed right there. How are we supposed not to plunge right into them?!
We waste the better part of an hour drinking beer and thinking of excuses to stay.
We do pull it together eventually only to treat ourselves to cake and smoothies in the very next town. Cactus & Coffee, cool place!

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Having ridden only a few kilometres I don't trust my clutch 100% yet for technical stuff. Divorce pass therefore remains, for now, undefeated.
By the time I realise that the Brandberg is on the wrong side of us we're already 40km down car-wreck boulevard in the opposite direction. We backtrack and refuel again in Uis for safety's sake.

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We're headed to Mowani Mountain camp, managed by my cousin Jo and her husband Zane. They'd just flown back in from SA, driving up from Windhoek airport.
We time our ride so they'll have a chance to unwind before we arrive, and also to catch a herd of twenty giraffe on the road.

The only thing more elegant than a running giraffe is twenty of them running together.

Shitty friend that I am, neglect to mention until it's too late that OliveOil is vegetarian. Luckily salad and roasted veggies come standard and a feta bake is spontaneously concocted. The rest of us have chicken too.
We stay up chatting 'til none of us can keep our eyes open and crash deep dents into the couches.

In the morning we dump all our laundry and hop on a game drive in search of Desert Elephants! We are privileged to some close interaction with Rose's group. A remarkable experience.
In fact the whole outing is very educational. We also visit the Twyfelfontein rock engravings. Fascinating stuff!
I commandeer Zane's laptop to free up some memory cards, copying all my photos and footage to one precious flash disk.

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We are banished to the sunset view spot, tall drinks in hand, while our hosts book us in as lodge guests. Doesn't get much better than this.
After dinner we can hardly wait to go trash our luxury room! Best night's rest by far and we wake up to a ridiculous view!

Today we're riding to Etosha National Park. Arranged to leave our bikes at Toshari lodge, currently undergoing major construction after a disastrous lightning strike.
Zane's thrilled to visit the park for the first time and we are but grateful for the opportunity. Everyone's a winner!

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We're welcomed by a big herd of elephants, forty-fifty strong, in all shapes and sizes. Intimidating as they can be, they move so gently and we just sit there watching them for a while.
Okaukuejo will be our home for the next two nights, finally ending our slutty streak of sleeping in a different place every night.
While we set up camp a black rhino walks right past the fence, unfazed. Magical!
At around 9PM we hear some snorting and squeaking sounds like deflating balloons. We run to the watering hole and find four black rhino there. On the second night there are at least six of them! So special!

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An excessively loud "Oi!" violently plucks me from my deep sleep. The black-backed jackal is busy scavenging our campsite. Jo and Zane save what they can. We joke, but rabies is real!
Hopeful for some felines we take a drive up to Halali. Regrettably no cats, but we do enjoy the massive herds of plains animals and get a few nice wildlife pictures.
I promise myself that I'll be back here soon and spend a lot more time.

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Reunited with our bikes again we jump on a D-road shortcut to Otavi, unaware of it being the last real gravel riding of the trip.
Since it's on the way we make the short detour and check out the Hoba meteorite.
At Roy's rest camp, before we can even get a drink, two women walk over and bombard us with their questions and admiration. Their enthusiasm and appreciation for what we're doing is humbling.

Motorbikes, an ice-breaker like no other.

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At the bar we meet almost every other guest as well: a Dutch boy all alone on a tour bus with elderly folks, Europeans and New Zealanders on their way to Kenya and beyond, and the Lamberts of Mile-4 in Swakopmund.
We stay for breakfast wishing all our newfound friends well before hitting the runway to Rundu.
 
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I don't regret getting to Ngepi early but I believe the D3425 might have been a nicer ride.
A beer in a hammock with a view over the Okavango has to be the ultimate. We relax for a good while.
Our tent is right on the water, hippo on the opposite riverbank. We hear them chortling at night.
Dinner is divine, even for the picky eater. The outside showers and "thrones" are a treat. As are the playful ridgebacks.
Our campsite neighbours from Potchefstroom are doing their first long distance trip on matching blue KLR's through Botswana and the Caprivi mostly, great stuff.

The beauty and added benefit of riding matching bikes is that it halves the amount of tools and spares to be carried. A hideous plot unfolds next involving Olive and a sneaky twist in the sandy exit road. The unfortunate altercation claims her clutch lever and pinkie finger.
She declares that she's okay and with a little help we get the bike pushed out of the tweespoor for traffic to pass.
By the time a new lever is fitted the finger looks sore, all blue and swollen, but this feisty badass wants nothing to do with splints or painkillers.

The rest of the day is spent waving at roadside children of the Caprivi, without which we'd have absolutely nothing to report on.
When they hear us coming they start running just to be with us for that split second longer. Some of their reactions are quite heart-warming. We feel like rock stars.

It's a 50km dash through Chobe National Park to Kasane. A heavy old daggaboy promptly reminds us to proceed with caution. This is a Big Five reserve.
We fall in line at the open-air hospital to have that finger checked out.
The process takes longer than initially anticipated but after some x-rays she's sent on her way with an ice-cream stick splint and we can finally enjoy some dinner at an adjacent hotel. It's 9:30PM.

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Assembling the tent in darkness is second nature by now and we're up early the next morning to catch our Pangolin photo safari at 6AM.
We have the boat to ourselves for four hours on the Chobe River, taking close-ups of crocodiles, African fish eagles, baby jacanas and pied kingfishers.
For those who love game viewing this is highly recommended. The hippos are just a little too close for comfort.

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Back on terra firma we demolish our breakfast, fend off some monkeys and break camp.

A few minutes later we board the Kazungula ferry to Zambia.
The queue of trucks waiting to cross over is astounding. It is said that they bivy like this sometimes for weeks at a time. What a life!

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KnopKop waits impatiently for us to dock, he's organised a fixer to expedite things.
The border post is a disorienting hive of activity but for a few dollars more we're already elbow-deep in Mosi lagers at Jollyboys backpackers.

There's a little bit of sand left in the hourglass so the three of us ride to a nice spot to watch the sunset over our mighty Zambezi.
Just last year we were standing on the other side looking over to where we are now. It feels pretty cool! Good memories.

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No time is wasted getting to Lusaka the next day. A quick airport-run for Pop and muddy, and that's how we got the band back together!
KnopKop shows us around and the booze starts to flow. We like to celebrate small victories, like empty glasses. "Well done! Here, have another!"

Harrier all loaded up we brave city traffic for some necessary admin and a killer breakfast before heading out to Lake Kariba. Heck, that's a lot of water, and this is just the beginning!
We go for a nice swim and walk up and down the beach. No-one brought fishing rods and no-one told us there are crocodiles in there either!

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Countless boats line the horizon with their lights that night. It's quite a pretty picture but I'm glad we're not sleeping in a houseboat out there on the infested waters.
Something to think about: if a tiger fish bites you, do you get the powers of a tiger fish? :)
It's a lazy morning on the sandy red beach and we all get a bit of sunbathing done while Pop and muddy walk ten thousand steps.

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Impromptu brunch replenishes energy levels before a supply shopping spree at one of the big malls back in Lusaka.
WORS KTM supply a pricey new rear tire for my bike. All that outrageous spinning has taken its toll on the old Heidenau.
We wrestle the new Pirelli onto the rim and get everything else packed and ready for our ride the next morning.

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This is the point where I discover that my flash disk containing all of my photos is AWOL. A blasphemous rush of terror surges through me.
I desperately upturn every bag and rummage through every last pocket but the damn thing is nowhere to be found. It’s gone.
It’s a long shot, but I nevertheless message Jo asking if they haven’t come across it.

Fond farewells to Lusaka nice and early and from the Luangwa River we manoeuvre all the road works and detours with style and grace meaning the bikes arrive in Chipata way ahead of the porn-mobile.
We have no comms but luckily the guys have the good sense to guess that we’re waiting at MamaRula’s.
The market is buzzing and we calculate that the average cargo load per bicycle is 3-4 bundles of coal and/or firewood, cornmeal and 1-2 passengers.
These people deserve twice the normal ThinkBike-gap.

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The boys befriend some locals at the bar and late that night our new itinerary is born.
When life throws you a mountain pass you ride it! The S127 is wound so tight and we worship every little twist of it!

There’s mainly two ways of commuting in Malawi and that is by bicycle, or leaking makoro.
Although these people are poor, they are extremely friendly and generous.
Monkey Bay is happy to see us and we’re just ecstatic that it’s beer o’clock!

That feeling when you take your stinky boots off and plant your feet in the soft sand. Mmm. We have arrived.

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The next five days are all about beach bumming it. Not a single care in the world.
We finally have the opportunity to do what we came here for and take our lilo’s out on the open water. For us, an epic milestone.
Celebrate another birthday getting loaded with KnopKop and enjoy some snorkelling amongst the blue cichlids of Thumbi West island.
It’s only on the last day that we discover how much we love kayaking. Me and my riding buddy ace it! Team Pop-Knop are capsize champs.

And when last did you see fireflies?!

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So this is the turning point of our little trek. We head for the hills again with bullet-proof new drinking habits.

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Best part of the Dedza border crossing, besides the crash course in Portuguese, is the truly warm welcome even though we’re short quite a few bucks!
Drawing cash proves to be impossible but we know Moatize is only a stone’s throw away. Not that anyone is throwing stones.
Despite all the injustices back home we always feel safe. Folks up here are fundamentally kind and peaceful.

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Business seems to be booming in the two-wheeled taxi industry. No ATGATT required and fuel bottles are sold everywhere.
It’s suddenly very hot. We manage to get some cash and groceries and tuck into our late lunch / early dinner at this neat little roadside restaurant.
Thinus, our host brings us up to speed with all the bribery and potential jail time we might be facing the next day.

With Dawn’s sweaty plumber’s crack in hot pursuit, we nervously head for Nyampanda.
Once again having to scrape together our last remaining greenbacks we barely manage to squeeze through but we do!
Our hunt for an ATM brings us to Mutoko, a modest little town that runs on ZimSwitch alone. Harare is our best chance to find VISA facilities…
We’ve already divvied up the last of our spare petrol and careful calculations confirm that we may now start to panic.

I don’t have an expensive camera, but after my house and bike it is hands-down my most valuable possession.
We narrowly escape having to pawn it off thanks to a handy spare bike battery I’d been carrying along for the past 7200km.
For a few litres of juice and a dollar bill each we must also part with our toasty winter gloves.
I’m still fuming about that when we ride into town but at the same time I’m very, very relieved.

Feeling flush after emptying out the first cash machine we can lay our hands on we buy a Wi-fi voucher at the nearest internet café.
So begins our online search for accommodation. We’re about 320km from Nyanga Park, our intended destination.
A seemingly perfect backpackers pops up on the radar and we brave the rush hour traffic to check it out.
Sadly it closed down about a year ago according to a former employee that magically happens to walk by while we’re contemplating pitching our tent in the quiet cul-de-sac. It’s dark now, about 18:30.

We don’t really want to trespass so, following our informant’s directions to another backpackers, we pass an O’Hagan’s.
Not having eaten all day due to our finance fiasco, our resistance crumbles and we swiftly pull in for a warm meal, cold beer and free Wi-Fi while a man called Nice-One guards the bikes.
Armed with smartphones we track down a cool place with WhatsApp contact details. Availability is confirmed and our room is booked!
Meanwhile I get a text from Jo saying that they found my flash disk with the photos of our first ten days on the road. It will be sent with the first lift to SA. Tears of joy!

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“It’s A Small World” meets all of our requirements. Firstly it physically exists, and secondly there’s a soft bed with lots of pillows!
I don't wait for an invitation and freefall straight into dreamland.
Over morning coffee we meet the philosophical Palestinian woman who’d borrowed our charger the previous evening.
What the conversation boils down to is that death is inescapable and these fleeting moments are all we’ve got. Enjoy them but don’t get too attached.

The beauty of Harare right now is its proximity to Masvingo. We’re an hour closer than we would have been had everything actually gone according to plan.
We arrive at Lake Kyle well before 3pm and pitch our ol' faithful tent one final time, before heading out to the ruins.

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Great Zimbabwe is mysterious and impressive and well worth MX-booting all those narrow staircases.
It's already dark when we return to the deserted parking lot. Glorious showers and dinner await us back at Norma Jeane's.
The evening is cool but we sleep comfortably. Next morning catches us a little off guard with a slight drizzle but it passes before we get going.

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Beitbridge is up next and it's the one we've been looking forward to the least. It takes us about fifteen minutes to get through departures.
After the bridge it's clear as daylight, welcome to SA. Note the tone that I am using right now...
About an hour and a half later we clear the border and it's smooth sailing to Levubu where we stay with some family.
My aunt cooks a massive variety of vegetables to make up for all the times Olive had to be fine with salad or fries.

After a great night's sleep knowing we're only about 450km away from our dogs and cats and washing machines, we mount our pretty ponies once again and wave our last goodbyes.


It's been an amazing adventure and I am eternally grateful that I could share it all with my frenny.
I think we learned a lot about the world and ourselves, and admittedly it was perhaps a bit of a race against time but I don't regret the opportunity to see all the places as far and wide as we did.
Our bikes may also not be the ideal tool for the job but damn they did us proud. No glutes no glory!


Thank you for reading!

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Fricking Awesomeness,!!!!!

What a pleasure to be hit with a completely brilliant ride report this time of the night.

Thanks ladies. You have done what I am still planning to do.

Great presentation

8) :thumleft: :thumleft:
 
Great stuff!! It was an absolute pleasure to have you guys here, and share some of these great memories!


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WOW!........................................................ :drif: :drif: :drif: :drif:
 
Wow, what an amazing trip. On my bucket list to do, as soon as possible.  :drif:
Well done both of you, so wonderful to see. Xx
 
Nice read, lovely pix...well done  :thumleft: :thumleft: :thumleft:
 
Wonderful ride report interpersed with appropriate pics and thoroughly enjoyed.
 
You guys set the bar high for ride report pictures  :biggrin: Great trip  :thumleft:
 
Jeez....this got it all - epic ride, adventure, great photo's and very well written.

Congrats ladies, it was a great read :thumleft:
 
Ag lekker julle!  Ai, wens so ons kon saamgaan!  Julle maak mens lekker jaloers!  Soos altyd Jolandi, is dit net jy wat 'n storie so lekker kan vertel - en jou foto's is stunning!!!  :thumleft:
 
Just awesome!!  :ricky:

You two have spirit and an excellent sense of adventure  :thumleft:

Beautiful pictures and well written! Thank you for sharing!  :thumleft:
 
Your trip reports are always a joy to read. Thank you for sharing
 
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