All right, all right, all right. Indulge me a little while I wait for my companions under this here shady tree…
Even if I reach back into the dark recesses of memory it’s a little hard to explain exactly why motorcycles in general, and motorcycle trips into the wilderness in particular, have become such an important part of my life in recent years. Yes, I grew up loving machines and engines and things. Yes, I like travelling and hanging with my buddies. Yes, I love the African wilderness. Yes I like the physical challenge and camping out under the stars. But none of this quite explains why these things have grown an almost mythical allure in my consciousness. Or why I look forward to them like a five-year-old dreams of Christmas, and after the fact reminisce about them like a bedridden old geezer without teeth dreaming of his first kiss.
Heading out into the wild yonder on these mechanical ponies strikes some chord deep inside what it means to be a man (sorry ladies)… embracing the unknown, feeling, for a moment, the wind of freedom, uncertainty and limitless promise on your skin, alive to the present in a way that little else in normal life provokes.
Big motorcycle trips are often brutal. We plan them meticulously, and then they always seem to come at the wrong time. They rip us away from responsibility, make us lose out on work contracts, force us to abandon families when they are squealing for our attention, cost much more than they are ever supposed to, break our bikes and sometimes our bodies, make us confront less appealing sides of ourselves. But they do also have some downsides.
Like many of you, I guess, we’ve gathered a bit of a tight crew. Tom and I bought bikes ten years ago, and have done almost all of our trips together. My brother Mike was pretty much responsible for getting me into this in the beginning. Every court needs a jester, so, The Midget. And this time The Gav would be joining us for the first time. Just to ‘break’ things up a bit.
The last big trip we did was four years ago. Four what!!!?? What on earth has happened to my life? It’s had its merry way with us. Marriage, babies, homes, careers. So clichéd I’d like to vommit, but it’s true. As lovely as an annual little jaunt around the Richtersveld is, it’s pretty familiar territory now, and just doesn’t cut it as a Big Adventure. And a Big Adventure was what we all urgently needed!
All the available options came up for consideration. Mongolia’s too far and better on horses. Columbia would be awesome but we’d lose the Midget for certain and we’re all scared of Mrs Midget. Crossing the Sahara is a long held dream, but we’d likely get abducted by Jihadists. The Midge is also terrified of camels. And none of these places have elephants.
Elephants. The more you stare at them, the odder they are. Even compared to giraffes, and those are extremely strange animals.
North west Namibia it was. On our doorstep, but home of the most dramatic motorcycle riding terrain on the planet. It’s wild, it’s hot, it’s dry, it’s sandy, it’s dangerous. What more can a man ask for?
And so the slobbering excitement started. Since my last Amageza attempt I haven’t had a bike that could take on any kind of adventure, because I sold my 450 to get into enduro riding. This is a pretty sick state of affairs, and needed remedying so I bought this:
2013 KTM 500. Feast upon her magnificence. The perfect adventure desert sled. Nothing even comes close.
The new boy didn’t have a bike either, so signing up was always going to be a big leap for him. He’d had a pristine 2012 990R since new, but although he’s done a shitload of adventure riding over the years, he’s a little new to the offroad scene, and wisely decided the R was going to be a bit of a handful.
We umm’d and aaahhh’d, perved the options and went for some test rides together. A new 701 nearly made the cut but there was a little curfuffle with the dealer and that fell off the radar. A new Honda 250 rally was next, but as nice as it is, the engine was considered not manly enough and it was struck down.
And then a well equipped 2013 690R popped up and the deal was sealed and it arrived in Cape Town on a trailer.
If you’ve spent any time wading your way through this thread
https://wilddog.net.za/forum/index.php?topic=133427.0 you may have noticed that The Englishman is not exactly partial to KTMs. Well, he’s now a dedicated Suzie man, and after the trauma of 2013 decided that he’d do a little thorough preparation this time. So Suzie got shown some real love: a new 28l Safari tank, serviced suspension, several trips to Claus the mechanic.
And that’s before we even discuss her owner. After a stead diet of squat thrusts, he was now in scintillating form!
Camel Man’s motor was already in stunning shape, so he busied himself with how to take water to the desert”
And the Little Fella kissed his mount once, kissed her twice and was assured she would take him to heaven and back without a hitch:
But Buttercup was feeling a little hard done by, so he splurged on an expensive accessory:
and then busied himself with wardrobe:
and strategy for dealing with wild animals:
Did I mention that by now we were in a frenzy of excitement laced with mortal dread about face eating hyenas and their ilk invading our campsites:
https://wilddog.net.za/forum/index.php?topic=211797.msg3862568#msg3862568
It was all about to begin.