Virgin Sand In Kaokoland (a post lockdown adventure)

[BoskakBruce]

The scene is gorgeous in the morning light. I want to speed up and enjoy riding the sand, but I’m too afraid that I’ll miss something beautiful, so I stay in 3rd gear, lugging the engine and taking in the scenery.

 

[BoskakBruce]

I stop to pee. It’s dead quiet. Nothing moves. I can’t help thinking that if something goes wrong out here, help is a long, long way away.

It’s around 8:30am when I drop into the Huab River bed.

The riverbed sand is deep and I’m enjoying carving through the corners. At the same time, I'm constantly scanning the horizon for elephants and within 2 minutes, one makes an appearance…

 

[BoskakBruce]

He seems to not be too concerned with me, but I’m definitely concerned about him because the riverbed track runs right in front of him.

 

[BoskakBruce]

I ride slowly past and pluck up the courage to stop and take a pic. I’m far enough away that if he charges me, I can still make a dash to safety.
But he’s chill and I move on…
And then I hear a roar on my left.
My head swings around like a it’s on a stick to see what’s there.
****.
It’s mama and papa elephant... and mama elephant does NOT like me there.

I hadn’t seen them grazing on the banks of the riverbed.

I stop at a safe distance to take in the scene… but that’s when **** gets real – real fast.

Mama elephant roars and charges towards me.

Oh ****! Oh ****! Oh ****!

I hit the starter button and blast off to the opposite side of the riverbed – maybe 150 meters away and stop facing mama elephant. Don’t ask me why, but I’m thinking “This would be a good place to take a photo.”

Any sane human would have sped the hell outta there and not looked back.

I’m clearly not sane.

I pull out my phone to take this pic.

 

[BoskakBruce]

But not 5 seconds later, she charges me again. She wants me gone.

This time, I get the message.

I plunge my phone back into my pocket, hit the starter and blast the hell out of dodge in a cloud of sand.

But the river wasn’t done with me yet.

Just around the corner, I stop dead in my tracks.

There in the distance, blocking my way, is baby elephant. ****! He’s a big baby... and there’s no way around him without passing dangerously close to him and risking being seriously hurt or killed.

He's still a ways away, but I soon realize that I’m surrounded - trapped between two elephants.

I keep looking over my shoulder to make sure that mama elephant isn’t following me. I don’t see her.

My mind is racing and my heart thumping in my chest. ****, I need a plan – fast!

My head is jerking around looking for exits and checking for mama elephant.

Baby elephant is still blocking the track, so plan A is to just wait for him to move on. But what if mama elephant arrives and chases me? Then I’m toast.

I notice a soft sandy bank to my left and immediately start my engine and ride up it to give me some space to maneuver should the **** hit the fan.

Baby elephant begins strolling towards me while I nervously wait on the bank to see what happens next.

I figiure that if baby elephant gets close enough to me, it will clear some space on the track behind him for me to ride around him and escape behind him.

I wait... and baby gets closer and closer.

When he's about 50 meters away, I hit the starter button. The engine roars to life and I kick it into gear.

Go!

I lurch forward struggling to get traction in the sand in 1st gear. I should have chosen 2nd.

Within seconds, I'm alongside him.

He’s scared. He probably hasn’t seen a motorcycle in 8 months. He starts running away and trumpets loudly in protest.

My heart is pounding as I pass him.

I look over my shoulder and he is runing away from me. I made it!

Thank god! That was too close for comfort.

You can watch last half of the drama on my GoPro footage here:

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PwBTYiGUCt8[/youtube]

 

[BoskakBruce]

Now, all I want to do is get the hell out of this river bed.

I’ve seen enough elephants for 100 lifetimes. I just want some open plains where I can see what’s ahead of me.

Soon, I get what I asked for and arrive at a beautiful rocky plain.

 

[BoskakBruce]

I see a hill in the distance that looks like it will make a fun hill climb and a great vantage point for a photo.

“This is probably a dumb idea.” I think to myself.

I’m alone in Desolation Valley. No humans for hours. Why risk a rocky hill climb?

Because it’s fun?

I’m an *****.

I start riding towards the hill. I’m riding through a rock garden and can’t seem to get enough speed to change into 2nd gear. My plan was to charge the hill, but now I’m at the foot and I’m still in 1st.

**** it. I’m just going to have to give it gas and pray I make it.

 

[BoskakBruce]

I don’t (make it).

I stop 2 meters from the top of the hill and I run out of steam.

****, it’s steep up here. How am I going to get down???

Here’s how…

[youtube]https://youtu.be/mbU_AundwwQ[/youtube]

 

[BoskakBruce]

After dusting myself off I decide to take it easy… very easy. I’ve learned how quickly things can go south.

“No more dumb ****, Bruce. OK?”

OK.

As I continue slowly on… The sandy tracks become windy, sandy tracks. I see elephant dung everywhere – like in this clip…

[youtube]https://youtu.be/EUk565XFLy4[/youtube]

 

[BoskakBruce]

I’m a little shaken, but I’m having a good time… It’s barren and gorgeous.

 

[BoskakBruce]

I’ve found a nice slow pace and I’m feeling confident and comfortable. The track is a kind of soft, deep gravel, so steering is difficult.

My front tire keeps riding up the center of the track and sometimes I feel as if I’m steering left, but riding straight. Weird.

And then it happens…

I don’t know how it happened, but it sure as hell happened.

Suddenly, a jolt. I’m in the air… superman style. Over the handlebars.

Actually, under the handlebars. The bike is above me.

Oh ****! Time slows down. I’m landing….

Oooofffff!

Ouch. Crunch. Silence.

I lay there for a while assessing whether or not I'm dead.

I’m not.

I stand up and surprisingly, I don't feel to bad. Nothing broken, I don’t think.

And then I look around and see the bike.

 

[BoskakBruce]

Fuuuuucck! My baby!

For some reason, I remember to snap a pic before rushing over to stop the fuel leaking form the tank.

I rush over.

Ouch. My ribs hurt. This is a familiar hurt. The same hurt I felt 2 months ago when I also flew superman style over my bars and broke my ribs.

I’ve fractured the same two ribs – again.

I know how this goes... I'll get a few pain-free hours and then suffering for two weeks.

I’m acutely aware that I’m in the middle of nowhere with two broken ribs and an upside-down bike.

I knock the bike over onto its side and then pic it up. I haven’t lost too much fuel, but the Giant Loop luggage strap has ripped and the luggage is hanging off.

I spend a few minutes making a quick video and then get to repairing the damage.

[youtube]https://youtu.be/oP1ZXoG6q74[/youtube]

 

[BoskakBruce]

I get on the bike and press the starter.

She starts first time! Damn, I love my 500.

But she’s been hurt. Her handlebars are bent. Not too badly, but enough that I need to adjust my riding.

I need to get going quickly, before the pain kicks in. I still have a riverbed to ride – a long one with lions and elephant in it. I’ve come this far, and I don’t want to abort now.

Perhaps I can still make it.

I dust myself off and get back in the saddle, this time even slower than before. It was a freak accident. Surprisingly, I wasn’t being an *****. I was riding at 30 – 40km/h. There was nothing I could have done to prevent it, I tell myself.

 

[BoskakBruce]

I stop after a few minutes to adjust the forks. Perhaps the handlebar is not bent and it’s the forks. If that’s the case, I can just loosen the bolts on the triple clamps and give it a few pumps.

I do that, but no dice. It’s the bars. I guess, I’m gonna have to go slow.

I start smiling again as I pass one of the most beautiful rock formations…

 

[BoskakBruce]

I pass some Rhino conservation workers and have a quick chat.

They are completely surprised to see me.

I’m delighted to see humans instead of elephants.

 

[BoskakBruce]

“Are you heading to White Lady Lodge via the Ugab river?” one of them asks.

“Yip”

“You know that motorbikes are banned in the riverbed?”

“Really? That’s not what I’ve heard…”

“Yes. The signs will go up in two weeks. But there’s an alternative route you can take.”

I pretend to listen to the alternative route, but secretly I’m thinking that if the Ugab riverbed really is closed to motorbikes, then this is my only chance I’m ever going to get to ride it – broken ribs and all.

I think he sensed that I wasn’t listening, so began another tactic to put me off…

“You know that there are lots of lions in the riverbed with cubs? They’re aggressive when they have cubs.”

“Really?”

“And elephants too. Lots of them. Are you not scared of them?”

“Terrified” I say telling the truth.

They’re lovely, people. But I’m not sure that I believe their story about motorbikes not being allowed in the riverbed.

They eventually drive off and once they are out of sight, I cross a mountain range and descend into the Ugab riverbed. As it comes into view, my heart starts racing.

 

[BoskakBruce]

What if there are lions with cubs that chase me?

What if I fall with two broken ribs and can’t pick up my bike? I’d be lunch for them.

I enter the riverbed and ride fast. My goal is to get this over with, but try to enjoy it at the same time. I’m not successful.

 

[BoskakBruce]

It’s dry and eerie feeling. I’m scared that death awaits me around every corner. I’m probably totally safe, but those damn Rhino guys succeeded at scaring me.

I’m not really enjoying this, but the GPS says that I have 75km to go. That’s two hours in the riverbed. A LOT can happen in two hours.

I arrive at the Ugab marshes. Marsh areas are terrifying for me because you cannot see what is around the corner. I could very easily ride smack bang into an elllie and have no space to turn around and run. I’d be stomped on and that would be that.

 

[BoskakBruce]

To make things even more scary, the marsh area is sandy and I fall twice creeping slowly around the corners.

My ribs are starting to hurt and picking up my bike is getting harder and harder.

After ever corner I say a little “thank you” to the big man upstairs for sparing my life again.

Eventually, after the longest two hours ever, I reach my planned exit. I haven’t seen a single damn animal the entire time.

I’m so relieved.

I put the hammer down and blast out of the riverbed and onto the dirt track to White Lady Lodge, where I’m planning to stay the night.

This has been a lonely day. I enjoyed it, but would have preferred to have had the boys with me.

However, I feel a sense of accomplishment. I did it. I survived. And so did the 500.

I arrive at White Lady Lodge, but there’s not a soul around.

So, I head to Uis and get fuel. That way, I can blast to Spitzkoppe, set up my tent and leave early tomorrow morning to meet the guys in Windhoek.

I arrive at Uis, fuel up and start putting my earplugs in when I hear the sound of a Thumper…

Thumpty, thumpty, thump…

****. It’s a biker.

No. Wait. It’s two bikers.

No. three.

WTF????

Ten motorcycles pull into the Uis fuel station to get fuel.

They look at me with the same look I’m giving them – the “WTF are you doing here” look.

I take off my helmet and greet them. They are all German and one of them is a woman in her 50’s. They’re on a tour together on Yamaha XT660’s.

We’re all so surprised to meet each other in the middle of nowhere that we stop and chat.

Eventually, I decide that I’m going to try to get a room at the same hotel that they are staying at in Uis. The hotel is fully booked out by the bikers, but I convince the owner to let me camp out back.

I meet Bjorn, their tour guide. Bjorn is Namibian born and is simply spectacular. He’s a charismatic, rough and tough kind of MacGyver character.

He generously invites me to join the group on a little excursion before dinner and then invites me to dinner with them.

After setting up my tent, we all chill around the pool drinking beer. It’s an AMAZING way to end the trip and an incredible day.

I didn’t take too many photos because I was probably too drunk to remember, but here’s one of the woman and her suitor on an XT660.

 

[BoskakBruce]

Shortly afterwards, we jump in the support vehicle and drive to the top of a mine dump to watch the sunset.